Caffeinated Babe: Hospitals and other red flags...

Caffeinated Babe: Hospitals and other red flags...: "'Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of ..."

Hospitals and other red flags...

"Life is not orderly.  No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." 

Natalie Goldberg

Natalie's words ring true to me.  Just when you think you've got things figured out, under control...you can count on some chaos.  In my case, if the Universe doesn't provide some, I can always whip some up!  In fact, self-made chaos is the best--that way I can pretend I have some influence on the outcome.

But that's not the flavor of chaos I'm discussing today.

Right now I'm thinking of how it feels having a flat tire on the way to the interview.  THE interview.  I'm thinking of finding out that you've been downsized.  Well, yes, your company, but really:  YOU.  And how about those doctor's visits?  "The bloodwork came back..."  Unless the next word is NORMAL, who wants to know?  I'm talking about catastrophic chaos.  The type that takes you a couple of years find some humor in, and that's if you're lucky.

Catastrophic chaos usually has an element of surprise to it.  Here's what happened to me this past week:  early in the week, I got a call from a friend who lives nearby.  She calls me frequently, sometimes just to discuss the latest headlines (she gets her news from talk-radio and I get mine from NPR--still, sometimes we  recognize a headline or two from the other's news source).  My friend told me that she was feeling sick, some kind of stomach thing.  A couple of days later, she called again, asking me to bring by a few things because she was not well enough to shop herself.  I was happy to do it, left the goodies on her doorstep, as requested.  A couple of days after that, my phone had been suspiciously quiet.  Not even a commentary on the latest Criminal Minds episode.  I stopped by her house again.  There was no answer to her door or phone. 

Which, it turned out, was because she was barely conscious. 

She is now in the hospital, in intensive care, receiving treatment for her illness.  She is expected to recover, but currently cannot breathe without assistance.  Yikes.

Needless to say, this post is not about my catastrophic chaos.  My friend is dear to me and I am grateful that she is expected to recover, but her illness reminds me how very fragile our selves really are.  Sometimes it takes a hospital visit to remind me of that.  Sometimes, though, life is not that obvious, and you DON'T have a flat tire on the way to the interview, or you get a NEW job after the downsizing debacle.  As Natalie says, sometimes you drop a jar of applesauce.  On a good day, you fall in love.  Mostly, it's not up to you.

Life's interruptions, big and small, miraculous and catastrophic, they're all coming, to each of us as we continue our spin on the planet.  It reminds me to be humble and to be ready.  Whether it means changing the tire, getting to the hospital, sending a love note, cleaning up the damn applesauce, as long as you're here, you're in the game.  So play hard and clean, and remember that tomorrow is coming whether you invite it or not.

But if you can, PLEASE stay out of the hospital--it's so much harder to get your groove on there!

Caffeinated Babe: Happy New Year, every day.

Caffeinated Babe: Happy New Year, every day.: "The beginnings and endings of all human undertakings are untidy.  ~Anonymous New Year's Eve has come and gone, along with Christ..."

Happy New Year, every day.

The beginnings and endings of all human undertakings are untidy.   ~Anonymous

New Year's Eve has come and gone, along with Christmas, Hannuka and Kwanza.  The official season for celebration is reduced to VALENTINE'S DAY preparations (for one thing,  a made up holiday, and for another. in the middle of FEBRUARY).  Prepare for a dry spell, party lovers.

Having said this, I am not a big fan of New Year's Eve festivities.  Not because I begrudge anyone fireworks and a good champagne buzz, and certainly, everyone should begin a new calendar year with a tasty kiss.  However, I have come to believe that one day at a time is as good as it gets, and celebrating 365 at a time overwhelms me.  I know, I know.  I accept ownership of this problem, and genuinely wish I was one of those people who gets goosebumps when the ball drops--it would certainly be a tidy and satisfying way to celebrate a new beginning. 

I have noticed that time passes fairly furtively.  In my case, it is for the protection of my mental health.  If I were able to truly absorb how transient and delicate each day's activities are, my heart would break and I would never leave the couch.  Or the asylum.  Intellectually, I know that one day, I will pine for the time when I had children climbing all over me (sometimes literally) and couldn't finish a sentence without one or two "MOOOMMMMMMMM..." interruptions.  In this instant, I am grateful that all my children are healthy, happy, and with their grandparents!  See?  It's sneaky how precious things sneak in and out of our daily shufflings.

And so it is with New Year's celebrations.  Many things can happen in a year.  One year, I fell in love.  One year, my mother died.  One year, I stopped drinking.  Hell, one year, I started.  One year, I had three jobs.  One year, I stopped working.  One year, I had a baby.  When events happen to me, great or small, momentous or trifling, they happen one at a time.  Mostly, I don't plan for these events, nor can I.  Should I? 

Live every day as if it is New Year's Day.  Because, really, it is.  Every day that you wake up and find yourself above ground, it is a new day, ready or not.  And it could be your last day.  Or it could be the day you meet the person you will marry.  Or it might be the day you win the lottery or lose your job.  But each day is its own package, with its own expectations and events.  So, if January 1st is a big deal to you, I am little jealous.  But I can't get too invested in one calendar date, because, well...

January 2nd will be here before you know it and I need to conserve my resources.  Plus, Valentine's Day is right around the corner. 

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.

 Each day has enough trouble of its own. 

Matthew 6:34